Congratulations! You’ve been stereotyped

Gaurav

“Hmmm…black or blue? What would look good on Gaura- !?” “Kiran, he’s gay!” “Oh…so pink it is!”

The day I came out, my mom said, “Gaurav, but you’re like any other guy out there!” and I was like, “Mom, that’s the whole point!”

And this was to be followed by a countless number of “No you’re not!” and “I can’t believe you are” and “Really, are you sure!?” and what not, and that’s every single time I came out.

The stereotype and stigma that gets attached to the community is inevitable; it cannot be avoided and simply cannot be crossed out. But what really can be done to stop it from spreading out is your own personal influence; to show others that just because you belong to a certain community, it doesn’t mean you will, or even should, behave in a certain expected way.

Most people who are not a part of the LGBT community think that if you are gay then you talk and walk in a feminine way, put on make-up, carry a ladies handbag and curl your hand around every time you want to make a point! And if you’re a lesbian then your favourite colour is black, you cut your hair short, have loads of body piercing, wear a needle-spike collar on your neck and roam around on Harley-Davidson bikes. But with understanding comes a realisation of facts and reality. Furthermore, those certain few who understand the community a little bit still stereotype when it comes to how gay couples consist of a feminine and a masculine person and lesbian couples consist of a lady with a sexy bridal dress and another a man’s tux.

Media in today’s world has a huge hand in painting this stereotypical image in people’s mindsets. From shades of grey to all the way, the main theme of the picture is nowadays decided by the media and taken as an oh-so obvious fact by the people watching it. From Bobby Darling to Dostana, they think everything on this side of the fence is a huge perky gimmick with pansy people, glamorous fashion designers with fur around their necks and hair dressers who bitch like girls and compliment ladies on their highlights. People so gladly pin these images to their brains, jump up and down like a kid and happily forget that reel life is different from real life.

On the flipside, yes there are people who are exactly like the ones portrayed in movies or match up to (and sometimes exceed) the image you have in your head. But these are people who behave exactly the way they want to, the way they like to, regardless of what people think, and should obviously be respected for the way they are! I see nothing wrong in keeping the flame alive in your flamboyant nature as long as you like it.

The LGBT community is as diverse as the whole world in general. You will have people with different interests in different professions with a huge diversity in their personality and the way they speak! Just like the trademark of the LGBT community, the rainbow, you have a spectrum of a multitude of colours, each one of which has a different emotion and feeling attached to it, and hence constituting a unique entity, and identity. Another stereotype attached to the community is that people who belong to it are mere perverts or sex maniacs; their sentences begin with promiscuity and end with ‘in my bed’. Now others attach their huge concerns on AIDS with this, a concern which in a funny way only seems to pop up when the LGBT community is mentioned. Talk to the hand I say! The ideas and thoughts about sex depend from person to person. Personally, I follow the ‘No boyfriend, no sex.’ policy. Hard to believe? Well, everything is at first.

Now we’ve all heard it from here and there, made jokes about it. If we make a big joke out of a general perception we hold for a certain type of people, it is okay, as long as we don’t mean it. But people need to realise that even though some might take these jokes in a light hearted way, some might take it to heart. Sadly we all do it at some point in our life, see it happen, but the worst scenario is when you’re the one the joke is cracked on.